I normally don’t do much a of a New Year’s resolution, simply because I know me and I know that a resolution to lose weight, stop drinking sodas, sleep more, work out more, save more money etc. is just a far fetched fantasy in my world.
But this year is different, although, I never even attempted to make a New Year’s resolution this year. To be honest, I was in bed by 8:30 and asleep by 9:00pm on December 31, 2016. I’m real fun at parties, ya’ll. So yeah, I failed to make any sort of promise to better myself…until now. Better late than never, huh?
I’ve seen myself evolve and change over the course of the last 25 years. One thing that has stayed somewhat consistent is my temper; though, I have learned to control it better, but that is not the point. Being quick to anger is frustrating, because I am generally a happy person with too much to be thankful for, but when it comes to inconveniences like missing an airplane, getting a random bill I can’t afford, or being caught off guard by life’s minor barriers, I am liable to lose control over my thoughts, which ultimately affect the way I perceive the situation I am involved in. Thus, I have decided to make my “resolution” here and now.
I’d like to resolve to stop and breathe. To take a minute to remind myself that inconveniences and annoyances are just that: inconvenient. Nothing more, nothing less. There is no need to lose control. No need to freak out. No need to come unglued. I want to start looking at these scenarios as a test of my patience and humility. If I looked at every negative situation as a test from God, I think I would have a lot more of my life figured out by now. But I am not embarrassed in the least to admit that I have not always been the most patient or kind person in the world. I have been rotten at times. Like I said, I have gotten better, but I am not at all where I want to be.
I just feel that I have too much to be thankful for to pitch a fit over something so minute as having to wait in line for 10 minutes or missing a flight. There are things happening in this world that are actually tragic, and my poor pitiful pity party is not one of them. As far as being thankful goes, I have always been thankful, but I never realized the depth of what I am actually thankful for.
I have two parents who are always there for me, loving me and supporting me in all that I do. I have an amazing fiance that holds my hand through the good and the bad. I am marrying into a family that loves me. I have a roof over my head. I have food. I have a small savings account. I have a job that provides benefits. I have two loving dogs and a gaggle of chickens, all of which bring me a great deal of happiness. I have more to be thankful for than I have ever thought through, and if you have any of the above or more, so do you.
I think it’s important to realize what you already have before becoming uneasy with what you don’t have. It’s also a great way to exercise empathy. So you may not be able to get your hands on the latest Michael Kors hand bag, but tell that to the lady who has been using the same purse from Wal-Mart for 20 years, because that’s all she can afford. You may have accidentally got stuck in traffic and had to miss your flight, but what about the guy that had to miss Christmas with his family, altogether, because the expenses of transportation weren’t even an option? You may be sick with a cold and feel miserable for days, but at least your sickness can be healed. You may be frustrated with God’s plan, but think of those who do not know Him at all, or worse, refuse His love.
I’m not trying to get super heavy on ya’ll. It’s just something that’s been on my mind and I usually share everything with my readers. Plus, the more I blog, the more I feel as though I was put on this Earth to write or to influence people in a positive way, and I felt that this was a positive note to start a Monday on. Just remember what you have before being distraught about what you don’t have, and then encourage others to do the same. We are all only human, so we are subject to an array of emotions and actions.
Personally, I want to strive to understand other’s that I don’t see eye to eye with. Especially in times when small barriers are involved such as having a rude waitress (she may be facing obstacles that you are unaware of, show her love), disagreeing on politics with friends (they were probably raised differently, and that is perfectly fine), or fighting with my partner (regardless of who started it, how can I do the most to make it better). If I just start with one situation at a time, I think I could really overcome most of my demons. My demons are the ones who tell me it’s OK to come unglued or be unkind, but really, that’s never OK. Again, we are all human. Your super rude waitress is someone’s daughter, mother, wife, etc. Have you ever had a bad day? Your super liberal/conservative friend still has a family that loves them, and they would probably be hurt to know that something as petty as politics would subject their loved one to ridicule and hate. Your partner is your partner for a reason, they have voluntarily chosen to spend their life by your side. Give him/her a break, do a little extra for them just because you love them for loving you.
I guess I got to thinking about this resolution for two reasons:
1.) I realized what a hypocrite I am. When someone is rude to me at my job, I think to myself “wow, what did I do to deserve that? That person was so mean!”. Yet, when I am angry at a company’s customer service, I think to myself “Geez, these people really have no clue what they’re doing. What a bunch of morons.” Same with politics. I’m the first to say “Well, they clearly don’t know what they’re talking about”, and then I get all up in arms when someone says the same to me. I’m awful at putting myself in the shoes of another. I haven’t been exercising any empathy, whatsoever. Therefore, I look pretty ridiculous, and no one wants to look ridiculous.
2.) I keep reading about the tragedies in today’s world. Whether it be poverty, sickness, people who have lost their families, or homicidal events, there are bigger issues than me getting stuck in 30 minutes of traffic or being slammed with a $200 cell phone bill. I still have more than the majority of the world, even on my bad days.
I am not holier-than-thou, ya’ll. I am literally THE WORST at times. I just feel it’s time I come clean about one of my biggest short-comings. Plus, I wanted to display this new perspective that I am going to try out, and I figured a few of my readers might want to do it with me. A little kindness and empathy goes a long way. Happy Monday ya’ll.